dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
