It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
