hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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