her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Everclear isn't food dammit
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
