How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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