I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
