ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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