I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
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