Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
pop tarts are not kleenex
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
