She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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