Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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