hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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