At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
