Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
