my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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