I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
