Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
