i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
