Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
zippers are such a cool invention
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
