You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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