I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
where does the pee come out of this thing
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
MIDGETS
????
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Randomize
