Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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