I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
