He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
