i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
