Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize