Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
