I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
