Jerry, you need to find god
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
