Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
