I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
