so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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