it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
