p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize