I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I use my feet as sexual weapons
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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