Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
