We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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