Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
