well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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