theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize