u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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