I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
only you would photoshop your dick
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Holy sore nipples Batman
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
