i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
