it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
