Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize