Do vagina's smell?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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