i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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