Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize