who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
