Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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